>>As we enter the year 2008, I made a sincere promise to myself to instill a new system of changes in my personal, family,& professional life this year. I'm leaving all the bullshit in 07, now I'm not going to call these changes resolutions because I feel they are much more than that, though I'm still a young man, I feel like I've wasted plenty of time & energy concentrating on the wrong things, instead of focusing on the things that actually matter. It's time to get my priorities straightened out. no more bullshittin and half-assin, now is the perfect time to jump-start a momentun for success and self- satisfaction. I'm done overlooking problems that needs to be fixed with myself, my relationships with my family and friends & how I deal with daily situations. It's simply overwhelming to just ignore them now & act like everything is super, when in reality shit is eating me up. I've always thought I was numb because I've been suppressing everything eversince my adolescent years, never given the chance to just let out my frustrations nor be able to have a normal family life growing up without a father. I used to say "fuck it' at everything, forcing myself to accept personal defeats & just straight up accept the fact that my family is struggling big time & there's nothing much I can do about it. That type of mentality is no longer appropriate as I witness my world go through major chaos & uncertainty this past year. I can & will do something about it, because I personally feel I deserve it. I'm passionate about the things I love and enjoy doing, I cannot keep on bullshitting myself & holding myself back from what I can achieve if i just put in the extra effort & time to actually just reach out and grab it. I cannot blame anybody else, yeah this place is scandalous at times, but I haven't been looking out for myself.
I've been neglecting my responsibilities as a son of a single mother who works her ass off to get us through. Year 08 is the time for me to do something that will make her truly proud of me as her son. fuck the financial struggles, it's always been a thorn on my side, I need to let my fam feel that I care for them & I appreciate eveything they have done for me. I'm optimistic about this year, I aint gonna let myself down. I have the right state of mind to tackle all these issues and to really turn it around this year. A new sense of hope & desire is burning within me. A lot of sacrifices will be made, but I cannot lose track of what I'm trying to achieve. Less cold brewery, Less nicotine sticks, Less self-pity..MORE can-do attitude & drive. I could give a fuck less-about the gltiz and glamour of a teens life. I'm on a personal mission to be a stronger better person in general. To reach that point where nobody can say a damn thing about your choices because at the end of the day you gave it your all. Imma grab it, I know its mine for the taking, it's only the second day of this new year & I already feel more alive & enthusiastic about the shit I'm going to encounter in 08 and so on. I'm sharpening my weapons now & my skin is tough enough for whatever combat & life battles imma face. The will to make it worthwhile is what I've been missing all these years, & it's true I had to hit more than a couple rock-bottoms in order for me to realize that, but thats the twisted beauty of it. like Immortal Technique said"I'm the only motherfucker that can change my life." so year 2008 is my year to shine, & nobody is fuckin with that. see you in paradise. --Grimmz One
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